Being Away

My personal rule of life urges me to take time for retreat in my schedule, ideally in the seasons of Advent, Lent, and Ordinary Time. This includes group activities like the annual autumn retreat that I love with my siblings from the Northeast Fellowship of the Order of Ecumenical Franciscans. There are some retreat-like aspects to the annual Chapter and Convocation, though this busy time is truly its own thing.

Where I struggle is in taking time for personal retreats. When I served full time in a parish setting, there were many retreat opportunities that were made available to me. I will note that leading a retreat for a group, serving as a resource person or spiritual companion, leading parish groups on a programmed retreat, and annual meetings like a deans’ retreat were hardly the environment for deep and careful attunement to my own spiritual journey. It was very easy to be near a retreat without actually being on one.

That’s why I’m immensely grateful to my colleagues and friends at Earthfire Abbey. Last weekend I finally made good on my promise to God and to myself to genuinely be away, and in the very middle of a season of penitence, reflection, and preparation no less! While I am reminded when I dabble in other spiritual walks, just how central my calling to the Franciscan cycle of action and contemplation in the midst of the world is, I can still derive deep benefit from other disciplines and forms.

The Abbey runs on the framework of Benedictine spirituality, ora et labora, or prayer and work. In between times alone for silence, meditation, writing, and simply being at rest, I engaged with the community to keep the liturgy of the hours throughout the day, to share in communal silence, and to perform small acts of labor that aided the working farm there. Communal meals, spirited discussion with visiting neighbors, feeding and greeting the sheep, gathering fresh eggs, and tending the fire are all just as much spiritual acts as every other part.

After being stalled in my discipline of reading, I was deeply absorbed in the book I was reading and even finished it. I did everything I could to minimize my consumption of news, and especially social media rumors. Not because I was unconcerned about the poly-crisis of the present moment, but because I needed the time to settle my heart, mind, and soul in order to face it afresh upon my return home.

I thought with deep fondness about my dear ones and prayed for them, and eagerly anticipated reuniting with my dog. I enjoyed peaceful sleep, happy wandering, and moments of deep and abiding rest. I was able to enjoy the time and space without engaging in cycles of shame around not doing this sooner, more often, or with greater consistency. Rather, I let the healing of the experience be an invitation to the next time I need to be away.

Practice

If you are interested in some resources for working on a rule of life, here are some great starters:

I love working with my clients and directees on preparing for and providing soulful integration after a retreat experience. This can be a phenomenal use of a session.

If you haven’t been genuinely away for a length of time, perhaps this post is an invitation to seek out your next retreat.

Be gentle with yourself, you are worth it.

Peace and Everything Good,

The Rev. JM Longworth, OEF Spiritual Direction and Trauma Care

https://www.sdicompanions.org/sdi-profile/GreenMtFriarOEF/ To book an appointment: https://calendly.com/greenmtfriaroef